The Two-Minute Self-Hypnosis Technique

By Colin G. Smith

Psychologists and Doctors used to send their ‘impossible’ clients to him and in many instances he helped them to turn their lives around. Milton H. Erickson was one of the most successful hypnotherapists in the world and is often referred to as ‘the father of modern hypnosis.’

One of the factors that set him apart from other change workers was his strong faith in the vast potential of human beings. He knew that when a person stopped stumbling around with their conscious mind and tapped into the limitless ocean of unconscious resources, people could make wonderful changes.

He used to look at a client and say something like, ‘You’ve tried to solve this problem with your conscious mind and failed utterly. Now is the time to access your unconscious resources in a way that resolves this problem effectively.’

Now you may be wondering just how can you really induce self hypnosis in two minutes!?

Well, one of the common misconceptions about hypnosis is that you have to be able to concentrate and go into a profoundly altered state. This could be done, however what we are really interested in is accessing other areas of our mind (i.e. unconscious resources) so that we can make certain changes giving rise to our chosen outcome.

The good news is you can do this very easily and you can give it a go now with the following techniques. No need for deep trance!

Three Magic Doors

This is a classic hypnotherapy technique. I think you’ll be surprised and intrigued at what your unconscious mind conjures up.

Think of a small problem you want to change. For example perhaps there is someone you would like to get along with better

Imagine there are three closed doors in front of you: Door one is labeled, ‘usual way’, door two is labeled, ‘another person’s way’ and door three is labeled, ‘wacky way!’

In a moment you are going to imagine walking through one of those door ways and your unconscious will then present you with a solution or new creative insights.

So as you look at those doors notice which one you are drawn to. Would you prefer to solve the problem in a, ‘usual way’, ‘another person’s way’ or a ‘wacky way!’

And then just allow your unconscious to create an experience behind that door that will give rise to what is known as a ‘ah ah’ eureka moment when you walk through to the other side.

When you feel ready imagine opening the door and walking through, becoming aware of what you are presented with. What do you see, hear, smell and feel? And as you look around what is it that you haven’t noticed yet?

You may or may not know at the conscious level how this experience is going to help you, but you can if you wish ask yourself, ‘how does this experience help me?’ or ‘what new ideas, insights and perspectives does this give me?’

Whenever we are stuck it’s as if our mind is locked into a groove. We can snap out of it and gain creative solutions by accessing the unconscious regions of our mind.

There are many techniques and methods that enable us to achieve this goal such as the ‘three magic doors.’

The Wall

What is it that you’d like some help with?

Imagine a big wall in front of you.

Just allow your unconscious or the creative problem solving parts of your mind to manifest some useful insights on the other side of the wall.

When you feel ready imagine jumping up and looking over the wall. You may have to jump up a few times to gather all the new information!

Playing around with these kinds of rapid self hypnosis techniques will cause you to learn to access more areas of your mind. And as you continue to do so you will find yourself becoming more capable of solving problems creatively.

Colin G Smith is a licensed Master Practitioner of Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) and creator of The NLP Toolbox

Your Vision - Your Reality

By Peter Shepherd

A goal is a desire made specific and with a deadline. Setting and achieving
goals that fulfill your needs is essential to health and happiness. Striving
toward your goals is a statement that you are taking charge of your life, rather
than life taking charge of you.

Visualizing a goal is more important than knowing every detail or even any
details of how you will achieve it. The first step for a painter is to visualize the
end result, at least in concept; the means of achieving that result are
extremely variable - different materials and styles, for example - and some of
the steps may require learning new skills or may depend on ideas and
inspiration that the artist knows will arrive at the appropriate time - he doesn’t
worry about them not being there at the beginning. However it turns out, it will
express his feelings and spirit, and that is more than good enough.

Seeking visualized goals is a powerful, natural tendency - like the tendency of
plants to seek the light - an insistent drive that can crack the hardest granite.
If you don’t have a clear image of where you want to go, this creative urge will
be frustrated and you may experience your life as meaningless or directionless.
Then you may visualize negative goals for yourself - you may see yourself as
incompetent, ill, in pain, a failure, and your creative power will tend to make
these a reality.

The first step in goal setting is to get in touch with what you really want in life.
Something that is truly inspiring for you, so you know it is “right.” It should be
what you really, really want, regardless of “what it takes.” Not what other
people want or what they expect of you, and not something to please others -
to inspire you it must be true to your self, something that will really motivate
you.

It may be a lifetime goal or one for a year, month or week ahead. Keep it clear
and simple but don’t set out your goal in terms of generalities like “some” or
“more” - be specific! Include tangible details of time, place, facts, figures,
persons. Clarify exactly what the goal means in terms of specific changes in
your life and a specific deadline for its achievement.

The goal should be achievable - maybe out of reach, for the moment, but not
out of sight! It should also be something you believe in, that you feel is right,
that is consistent with your values.

Then envision that situation in your mind as actually happening now. Express it
as a statement of fact in the present tense, see yourself with the goal already
accomplished. What are you doing? What are your surroundings? What are
people saying to you? How are you feeling now that you have accomplished it?
Get the feeling of that achievement in your heart and celebrate! That feeling
will then stay with you and energize all your actions toward manifesting the
goal.

Here are some examples of well expressed accomplishments: “I am going on a
singles club outing once a week and meeting new people I get on really well
with [the goal to make 5 new genuine friends].” “I am swimming a mile three
times a week and I feel stronger and more alive [the goal to get fit by
swimming a mile three times a week].” “I am living comfortably within my
budget for food, clothing and entertainment; now I feel financially secure and
in control of my spending [the goal to live within my budget by three months
time].” “Bob and I are understanding each other and really loving and trusting
one another and we are having beautiful sex [the goal to improve the
communication in our relationship so that our sex life is great again].”

Don’t use negatives such as “I am not over-eating.” Think positive! Also
negative goals, or not being able to see yourself actually achieving the goal,
strongly indicate the likelihood of internal conflict taking place, in which case
you need to handle this, to identify the limiting beliefs and revise them.

For example, you might learn that you are afraid of how others will respond if
you achieve your goal, or that you are unable or unwilling at this time to
perform the necessary steps to proceed, or that the goal is really meant to
please another or match somebody else. In these cases, you first need to
thoroughly grasp and accept the conflicting viewpoints and feelings involved
and compare them to the current reality, your actual needs, and to realize any
distorted thinking taking place. Then either the goal will be clarified and the
problems drop away, or you will see that the goal is not genuine and choose
another goal.

You then also need to work out an action plan, covering the steps you need to
take in sequence to manifest your goal. What do you need to do, change,
learn, or implement, to move your life from where it is now to where you want
it to be?

To plot out your path, it is best to work backward from your vision of an
accomplished goal - that way you ensure you stay on track, that what you plan
leads to the goal and not some place else. What has to be done to enable you
to finally achieve the goal? What has to be in place? Then you just proceed
backward: what needed to be done one step earlier? Work back to the first
steps you need to take. The first steps need to be things that you know you
can do, so you can get going. Put this in writing and share your goal with those
who will support you.

As you begin to act, identify your fears, accept and release them. Identify
other things you are doing, perhaps habitually, that in fact make it difficult or
even impossible to eventually achieve your goal, and stop doing those things.

Identify and revise your limiting beliefs (including beliefs that you have been
suppressing), and shift that energy into the love you have for your vision.
As you put your first steps into reality you will find yourself acting in ways
compatible with creating your vision; ideas and resources will fall into place.
Setbacks are inevitable but you can learn from them, then re-establish your
vision and move on with greater confidence than before. Use all that you have
learned to establish and boost your self esteem - be your own greatest
supporter. With self-confidence you’ll want to stretch yourself and try new
things. And remember the reasons why you are doing what you are doing - this
will help you do whatever it takes to reach your goal, to be patient when
necessary, and to be persistent with your efforts.

It is equally important to focus also as ruthlessly and honestly as possible on
the current reality. And this is key: measure your progress from where you
started, not against how far you have to go. Each action in which you
demonstrate your competence boosts your self-esteem; each development that
you make happen boosts your morale.

By comparing your progress with the point at which you started out, you will
be encouraged to continue. Goals are achieved step by step and each step
needs to be validated - otherwise the goal may seem far away and it may feel
you are making little progress, when really you are.

Then compare your current reality and state of progress with the final vision -
the next steps will be clarified and you will be motivated to continue. This is an
improvisatory process and cannot be entirely predicted at the outset. Since
creating is improvisatory, the steps you planned to take and even the goal
itself may be revised. Now you know yourself better you may discover that you
actually want something very different from what you originally set out to get.

THE FUTURE EXISTS
FIRST IN IMAGINATION
THEN IN WILL
THEN IN REALITY

Have a great time (setting and achieving goals is the game of life).

SOURCE: Tools For Transformation

I Saw Me

“I’m sorry. Please forgive me! I don’t mean to hold you up,” he said as he struggled to get off the escalator.

I’ll admit to it. There have been times when walking or driving behind an older person I’ve gotten impatient and upset. I’ve huffed and zoomed around them because I was in a hurry to get nowhere. Perhaps I’m more aware of it now because I see myself there one day soon. Today I saw myself in this old man’s shoes and it caused me to slow down, stop and ask for his forgiveness.

He was about five or six people ahead of me. I was in a hurry and saw him as an obstacle. I’ve seen people get off the end of an escalator and stop dead in their tracks, gather their things and suddenly there’s a pile up of angry people behind them. You can’t stop an escalator full of people behind you. Like the Energizer bunny, they keep on goin’.

This man was well aware of the challenge. He tried desperately to step aside. Fumbling with his small packages, struggling to gain his footing, you could see how troubling this was for him. “I’m sorry. Please forgive me! I don’t mean to hold you up,” he said as he struggled to get off the escalator.

I suddenly saw this in a whole new light. It was like I was watching my future. I felt sorry for him. I felt sick to my stomach because this man was apologizing to everyone, when we should have been helping him and calming his fears.

One by one, people zipped around him. I heard a few angry comments whispered as one lady passed by him.

I saw me.

By the time I got to him he was just about steady on his feet.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t know there was more,” he said.

“No, sir. No more with me,” I said. This really hit me hard. I realized right then how sad it was that the world was in such a hurry. That, of course, included me. But…no more with me. Count me out.

This wonderful man paid his dues. For whatever time he had spent on this earth, he most likely walked many rough roads and too many important miles. Now he should be apologizing for moving slower?

My heart ached as I looked into his eyes. I wished that I could see what he had seen all those years. His face weathered from life itself, was creased and wrinkled. The small soft pockets under his eyes and the gentle lines that curved up and around them told me he had many happy moments, too. Those were traces left behind from laughter and a smiling, happy man.

“My friend, can I help you with those things?” I asked.

Hesitant at first, he finally said, “Well, yes, thank you!”

I placed my hand under his left arm and walked with him a safe distance away from the rush of people.

“So what are you shopping for, sir?”

“Oh, just a little something for my neighbor. She’s a young mother raising kids on her own. She’s always so nice to me. I thought a box of candy for Mother’s Day…” he said, stopping suddenly as he searched his inside pocket of his sport coat.

“Do you need something?” I asked.

“Oh, no. Here. I think I have it right here. I always carry them with me,” he said. Then pulling out a hand full of papers he shuffled through them and handed me a business card that read:

“John A. Pomicter Friend to all…enemy to no one! I said a prayer today and you were the answer. Thank you!”

“That’s for you,” he said. “Thanks for stopping to help an old man.”

“My friend, you helped me. I discovered that I was unhappy with the world and I was part of the problem. Now I’ll be part of the solution. No more with me!”

“Then this was meant to be,” he said smiling.

“You know God sends me gifts every day and always at least one special person. You were my gift for today! Let’s go get some chocolates, my friend.”

From Author Unknown

Muscial Savants

Derek, now in his early twenties, was born premature, at 25 weeks, and weighing just over half a kilogram. As a result of the oxygen therapy required to save his life, Derek lost his sight, and his development was affected too. It later became apparent that he had severe learning difficulties. However, he soon acquired a fascination for music and sound, and, by the age of four, had taught himself to play a large number of pieces on the piano, of some melodic and harmonic complexity (such as ‘Smoke Gets in your Eyes’). Almost inevitably, with no visual models to guide him, his technique was chaotic, and he his elbows would frequently be pressed into service, as he strove to reach intervals beyond the span of his tiny hands!

At this time, his enormous potential was recognised by Adam Ockelford, then music teacher at Linden Lodge School for the Blind in London. In due course, weekly and then daily lessons were arranged, in an extensive programme of tuition that was to last for several years. Painstakingly (though physical demonstration and imitation) Derek acquired the foundations of technique that were necessary for him to move forward. His natural affinity for jazz, pop and light music soon became evident; together with his improvisatory talents, ability to play in any key, and flair for performing in public!

Derek ParaviciniDerek’s first major concert was at the Barbican Halls in London, when he was just 9 (in 1989). He played jazz with the Royal Philharmonic Pops Orchestra. Numerous national and regional television appearances followed, in the UK and overseas. His increasing maturity both as a person and performer enabled him to give concerts in venues across England and in Europe; among them, Ronnie Scott’s renowned jazz club in London.

Today, Derek is a student at Redhill College in Surrey, England, run by the Royal National Institute of the Blind. He attends courses at ‘SoundScape’ — a unique performing arts centre for young adults with learning difficulties and exceptional musical abilities or needs. His talent, love of music, and — above all — the ability to communicate through sound means he will continue to thrill audiences for years to come in the UK and abroad.

Rex Lewis-Clack

Rex was born blind, with brain damage so severe it looked as though he would never walk, talk, or do much of anything. And yet he has a talent few of us can imagine. To understand Rex’s brain would be to unlock mysteries of language, memory, and music.

Rex at age eight was a study in contrasts. Blind and full of enthusiasm, Rex was unable to dress himself, or even carry on a basic conversation.

But with everything Rex can’t do, he can instantly identify any note that is played for him. It’s a talent only one in 10,000 people have.

But that was just the beginning of Rex’s gifts at the piano.

Rex played a song he had never heard – “Do You Know the Way to San Jose” – with Rex’s piano teacher singing along. Despite not being able to see the keys, Rex was able to play the song himself after a single hearing.

Rex is a musical savant, one of a handful of people in the world who share a mysterious combination of blindness, mental disability, and musical genius.

But away from the piano, Rex was a different child, easily upset and confused by basic concepts.

Does damage in one part of the brain somehow enable brilliance to develop in another part of the brain? Do these abilities lie dormant somewhere within all of us?

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Why Change Can Be A Challenge?

Great article over at Scientific American… Millions of us dream of transforming our lives, but few of us are able to make major changes after our 20s. Here’s why….

“The shortest path to oneself leads around the world.” So wrote German philosopher Count Hermann Keyserling, who believed that travel was the best way to discover who you are.

That was how 22-year-old Christopher McCandless was thinking in the summer of 1990, when he decided to leave everything behind—including his family, friends and career plans. He gave his bank balance of $24,000 to the charity Oxfam International and hitchhiked around the country, ending up in Alaska. There he survived for about four months in the wilderness before dying of starvation in August 1992. His life became the subject of writer Jon Krakauer’s 1996 book Into the Wild, which inspired the 2007 film of the same name.

Read more…

Advice From The Dalai Lama

It’s been making the rounds, so I figured, why not here for those who haven’t seen this list before. Instructions for Life in the new millennium from the Dalai Lama:

1. Take into account that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

2. When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.

3. Follow the three Rules: Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.

4. Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck.

5. Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly.

6. Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

7. When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

8. Spend some time alone every day.

9. Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.

10. Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

11. Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll be able to enjoy it a second time.

12. A loving atmosphere in your home is the foundation for your life.

13. In disagreements with loved ones, deal only with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.

14. Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality.

15. Be gentle with the earth.

16. Once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.

17. Remember that the best relationship is one in which your love for each other exceeds your need for each other.

18. Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.

19. Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.

10 Common Dreams And What They Mean

Everyone dreams (even if we don’t always remember them after the fact) and researchers have found that the majority of us have dreams with similar themes.

For years people have tried to interpret the fleeting images that we see when we go to sleep - some interpretations are outright bizarre, while others are pretty understandable. This is a list of the interpretations that the Association for the Study of Dreams has given to the most recurring and common types of dream.

10. Car Troubles

In these types of dreams you are usually in or near a car or some other type of vehicle which is out of control or has other problems that seem insurmountable. For example, the brakes may have failed, you may have lost control of the steering, or be heading over a cliff or crashing. You can either be the driver or the passenger. This is a very common type of nightmare and it occurs in all people - not just those who can drive. This dream usually means that you are feeling powerless over something in your life - or that you are heading for a crash (metaphorically speaking).

9. Faulty Machinery

In the faulty machinery dream you are trying to operate mechanical equipment which either fails to work, or fails to work in the way that you expect it to. The vast majority of these dreams involve a telephone - either trouble dialing, losing a connection, or dialing a wrong number. It can involve a lost Internet connection, or something manual like a jammed or broken machine. This dream often means that you feel you are losing touch with reality, or that a part of your body or mind is not functioning as it should. It can also occur when you are feeling anxious about making a connection with another person in real life.

8. Lost or Trapped

Dreaming about being lost is very common and will usually occur when you are having conflict in deciding how to react in a situation in real life. In the dream you are trying to find your way out of an area - such as a forest, city streets, a large building, or other maze-like structure. Another way this dream plays out involves you being trapped, buried alive, caught in a web, or unable to move for some other reason. This is often accompanied by a feeling of terror. This dream usually means that you are trapped in real life - unable to make the right choice.

7. Missed a Boat or Plane

In this type of dream you are rushing to catch a bus, train, plane, or other type of public transport - but you miss it - usually by a fraction of a second. Rather than feeling fear in this dream, you usually feel frustration. This dream can also occur in a different form, in which you arrive late for an important performance or sporting event that you are supposed to participate in, only to find that the event has already begun. This dream usually means that you feel that you have missed out on an important opportunity in your real life. It will often occur when you are struggling over an important decision.

6. Failing a Test

This dream usually manifests itself in people who have been out of school for a long time. In the dream you are prevented from passing a test in a variety of different possible scenarios. In one scenario you find that you are unable to make it to the test on time, often through being unable to find the test room. In other versions you are unprepared (either through lack of study) or you are missing equipment. This dream usually means that you are feeling tested in some way in your real life. You may feel that you are unprepared for something or playing the wrong part in life.

5. Ill or Dying

In this dream, you (or a loved one) are ill, injured, or dying. It is a moderately common dream and, not surprisingly, occurs often at the onset of an illness. Aside from becoming ill, this dream can mean that you are emotionally hurt or are afraid of becoming hurt. The dream may also be warning you of an upcoming physical risk to yourself or a loved one. When it is someone else in the dream that dies, it can mean that you feel that part of yourself (that you see represented by that person) is dead. It may also mean that you wish the person would go away, or that you fear losing them.

4. Being Chased

Dreaming of being chased can be a truly horrifying experience. Most often the chaser is a monster or some person that is frightening, and occasionally it may be an animal. You may be surprised to know that this is the most commonly experienced nightmare theme. The meaning of these dreams is that someone, something (possibly something as obscure as an emotion) is making you feel threatened. One way to determine the root of the threat is to ask yourself who or what in your real life most closely resembles the “creature” or circumstance in your dream. It is also worth noting that sometimes this dream is a replay of an actual event in your life.

3. Bad or Missing Teeth

Teeth dreams are fairly common and they usually involve the discovery of extremely decayed or missing teeth in your own mouth. Sometimes you will dream that you open your mouth and your teeth begin to fall out. The fact that the majority of people today have reasonable teeth (perhaps with the exception of the British), it is not surprising that we feel so emotionally disturbed by these dreams. So, what does it mean when we dream about missing teeth? At the most basic level it means that we are afraid of being found unattractive. At a deeper level, it can signify a fear of embarrassment or a loss of power in real life. Oh - I was just kidding about the “British” thing!

2. Dream Nudity

In this type of dream you are in a state of undress, partial undress, or inappropriate dress (for example wearing pajamas to work). Occasionally you are the witness of another person who is naked while you are clothed. This is often accompanied by feelings of embarrassment and shame, but occasionally with the feeling of pride or freedom. The meaning of this dream is that you are feeling exposed, awkward, or vulnerable, or you are afraid that you have revealed too much of yourself (such as a secret or a very personal feeling) in a real life situation. An interesting fact about this type of dream is that it occurs much more frequently in people who are involved in a wedding ceremony in their real life.

1. Falling or Sinking

We have all had falling dreams - it is such a common dream, in fact, that myths have arisen over them; the most common myth is, of course, that you will die if you hit the ground in the dream. I can assure you, having hit the ground in more than one falling dream, that this is not true at all. In the falling dream we are usually falling through the air and frightened. Occasionally we may be sinking in water (and in danger of drowning). Typically a person having this dream is feeling insecure or lacking in support in their waking life. These dreams often occur when you are overwhelmed in life and feel ready to give up. If you have this dream you should evaluate your current situation and try to locate the problem that is overwhelming you. Deal with it and this dream should go away.

Source: The List Universe

Get It Together - How Americans Manage Their Time

The average American spends almost 4 minutes searching for lost keys, television remote controls, mobile telephones and other elusive household items every time one of the little suckers sprouts legs and walks off or so says a survey conducted exclusively for American Demographics by Rochester, N.Y.-based research firm Harris Interactive.

The survey found that not having enough time is the biggest excuse people use for not getting organized. In fact, almost half of Americans (44 percent) say they don’t have time to get their stuff in order. But, ironically, those who are the most organized spend considerably less time looking for lost belongings.

According to the nationally representative survey of 2,288 adults conducted online between February 11 and 13, the 10 percent of Americans who consider themselves “extremely organized” say that, on average, they can locate something they’ve misplaced in as little as 1 minute and 18 seconds, while the 7 percent of adults who say that they are “not at all organized” take an average of 8.5 minutes to locate a missing item.

Disorganization appears to be an equal opportunity trait, with equal numbers of Americans across most demographic groups saying that they are organized. Whether you’re a man or a woman, young or old, with kids or without doesn’t seem to affect your likelihood of being a neat freak. What does seem to matter is marital status. According to the survey, 61 percent of married adults say they are either “extremely” or “mostly” organized, compared with just 54 percent of never-married singles and 49 percent of divorced, separated or widowed adults. Previously married Americans (15 percent) are more than twice as likely as married (5 percent) and single adults (7 percent) to say clutter is their middle name.

Regardless of one’s level of organization, however, 89 percent of Americans say they could use help tidying up some corner of their life. Nearly half of respondents (48 percent) told American Demographics they need help getting their keepsakes in order - the area in most dire need of attention. Quite a few Americans could also use help organizing their closets and clothes drawers (42 percent) as well as their finances, including bills, pay stubs and receipts (35 percent). A significant share of respondents (27 percent) admit they need some help in the garage, at their computer station or with their facts and figures (telephone numbers, addresses, birthdays, etc.).

Of course, if getting organized was all that easy, everyone would do it. Or would they? In addition to time constraints, Americans say that not having enough space is another major roadblock to their organizational efforts - 39 percent use this excuse. Others feel that without the cooperation of everyone in their household, there’s no use even trying (26 percent) or that getting organized is so overwhelming they wouldn’t know where to start (16 percent). Naturally, there are also those who admit that they are just too lazy (22 percent) or that they simply don’t care enough about organization (17 percent) to bother. Not surprisingly, men are the most likely to state apathy as an excuse, whereas women complain more that they are overwhelmed by the idea of getting started.

Still, there are scores of Americans who would be willing to take action, and even pay for some help. According to our survey, 54 percent of adults say that they have purchased or would be willing to purchase containers, furniture, file systems or similar products to help them get organized. Young Americans are the most likely to take this approach. Seventy-two percent of young women (ages 18 to 34) and 57 percent of young men have bought or would consider buying such products. A quarter of those surveyed also say they have built or would consider building new cabinets, closets or shelving space to help them eliminate clutter. And then there are the 6 percent of Americans who would prefer hiring someone else to clean up their mess. Mom was way underpaid.

Byline: JOHN FETTO American Demographics

How to Be Positive During Tough Times

Great article from US News and World Report. Here’s why it’s so important to stop complaining.

It’s too easy to complain right now. You’re paying through the nose for gas, you’ve put off retirement for another five years, your company just sacked 10 percent of your coworkers, and your workload has doubled. Even worse, your CEO made more money than the Chicago Cubs last year. It’s ridiculous! It’s outrageous! And you can’t get a day off to save your life.

Well, you’re probably the reason Jon Gordon, an author, speaker, and consultant, wrote The No Complaining Rule: Positive Ways to Deal with Negativity at Work, because negativity is contagious. It spreads through organizations, hurting performance and productivity. Gordon recently sat down with U.S. News to talk about finding a better outlook on hard times. Excerpts:

Are you suggesting all complaining should be wiped out?

It’s the mindless complaining and the subtle negativity that really destroys organizations and teams.

Complaining is contagious, as we know. You get off the phone and you’re surrounded by people, maybe in a cubicle, and you start complaining to that person next to you, and that person starts complaining to the person next to them. One person can really affect an organization with their negative attitude.

What really separates complaining from other conversation?

There are two kinds of complaints. There’s a chronic, mindless complaining which is just venting and complaining, where you just feel helpless, you feel powerless. No. 2 is because it’s becoming a habit. You’re just so used to doing it.

On the other hand, a justified complaint says: Here’s what I don’t like, here’s what I don’t want, here’s what’s wrong. But here’s what I think we should do about it. It’s all about intent. If you care about the organization and you want something better for everyone, then it’s a positive complaint. If it’s all about your own ego, then you’re not interested in serving the team.

How can almost-retirees stay positive, when they have to stay at work or go back to work because they aren’t financially able to retire?

It’s “get to” versus “have to.” You get to go to work. You get to have a job, versus “have to.” So many people your age are sick. Many people have not even made it to your age. My mom passed away at 59 a year and a half ago. She was young. She was a real estate agent, and she got cancer. When I speak to people in real estate, I’ll say, ‘I know you’re facing a tough market right now, but you get to have this job, you get to live this life. My mom wishes she was in your shoes.’ And that really resonates with them.

You get to drive in traffic. Many people don’t even get to drive a car.

No. 2: They can go to work every day and say, ‘What bigger purpose can I fuel up with today?’ The research is clear—people are the most energized when using their strengths for a bigger purpose, beyond themselves. Older people have a lot of gifts to give in the workplace—a lot of wisdom and a lot of advice. Mentor, teach, share, and serve.

How do you face challenges?

When you’re facing that obstacle, look for the lesson; look for the opportunity in the challenge. Look for the solution in the complaint. Look for the action that needs to take place. The next president of the United States will be someone who has a clear vision for the future and offers solutions, not complaints.

Stay positive. This is not Pollyanna. But you have to have a positive vision for the road ahead. Looking forward—no matter what age you are—and being optimistic is the key.

Gratitude seems to play a big part.

It’s everything. I think it really is everything. All the research on gratitude is so powerful: You see that you can’t be stressed and thankful at the same time. It’s the way our brains and bodies are wired. So you focus on gratitude and you won’t be stressed. It’s the best stress reducer.

Is gratitude in short supply?

No doubt. OK, you’re paying $4 a gallon for gas, and I’m as upset as anybody. But you can say: ‘We’re not paying $8 a gallon. And we live in a free country. We live with so many amenities. We live with so many free things that we can enjoy.’… Instead of focusing on that complaint, you can now be grateful for what you have. And which emotion’s going to uplift you? Gratitude. Which one’s going to enhance your longevity? Gratitude. Which one will strengthen your immune system? Gratitude.

It seems an unusual topic for the workplace.

It’s harder in the workplace, and it’s not as natural. A great example is Doug Conant, the CEO of Campbell Soup. He’s written 16,000 thank-you notes to his employees over the last seven years. The No. 1 reason that people leave their jobs is because they don’t feel appreciated. It’s not only being thankful for your job, but being thankful for the others that you work with.

How successful are some corporate programs aimed at increasing positivity?

It has to permeate the organization. It has to be part of your DNA, of who you are. It works if it’s sincere. It works if it’s real, and if people know you really care about them. I can walk into a restaurant and tell if it’s a fake smile or it’s real. You can walk into a company and tell whether it’s real or not.

You say that negativity fills voids. What voids should companies look out for?

If employees don’t feel seen or heard, or they don’t hear and see, they don’t know what’s going on and they don’t feel communicated with, we will assume the worst. And the great example of that is cancer. Cancer sits alone in the body. It starts acting alone. It’s the same way with a company. If you think you are alone, you’ll act alone. But if you feel like you’re part of the body, part of the whole, then you’ll support the whole.

Copyrighted, U.S.News & World Report, L.P. All rights reserved.

The Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon

You may have heard about Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon before. In fact, you probably learned about it for the first time very recently. If not, then you just might hear about it again very soon. Baader-Meinhof is the phenomenon where one happens upon some obscure piece of information– often an unfamiliar word or name– and soon afterwards encounters the same subject again, often repeatedly. Anytime the phrase “That’s so weird, I just heard about that the other day” would be appropriate, the utterer is hip-deep in Baader-Meinhof.

Most people seem to have experienced the phenomenon at least a few times in their lives, and many people encounter it with such regularity that they anticipate it upon the introduction of new information. But what is the underlying cause? Is there some hidden meaning behind Baader-Meinhof events?

The phenomenon bears some similarity to synchronicity, which is the experience of having a highly meaningful coincidence… such as having someone telephone you while you are thinking about them. Both phenomena invoke a feeling of mild surprise, and cause one to ponder the odds of such an intersection. Both smack of destiny, as though the events were supposed to occur in just that arrangement… as though we’re witnessing yet another domino tip over in a chain of dominoes beyond our reckoning.

Despite science’s cries that a world as complex as ours invites frequent coincidences, observation tells us that such an explanation is inadequate. Observation shows us that Baader-Meinhof strikes with blurring accuracy, and too frequently to be explained away so easily. But over the centuries, observation has also shown us that observation itself is highly flawed, and not to be trusted.

The reason for this is our brains’ prejudice towards patterns. Our brains are fantastic pattern recognition engines, a characteristic which is highly useful for learning, but it does cause the brain to lend excessive importance to unremarkable events. Considering how many words, names, and ideas a person is exposed to in any given day, it is unsurprising that we sometimes encounter the same information again within a short time. When that occasional intersection occurs, the brain promotes the information because the two instances make up the beginnings of a sequence. What we fail to notice is the hundreds or thousands of pieces of information which aren’t repeated, because they do not conform to an interesting pattern. This tendency to ignore the “uninteresting” data is an example of selective attention.

In point of fact, coincidences themselves are usually just an artifact of perception. We humans tend to underestimate the probability of coinciding events, so our expectations are at odds with reality. And non-coincidental events do not grab our attention with anywhere near the same intensity, because coincidences are patterns, and the brain actually stimulates us for successfully detecting patterns… hence their inflated value. In short, patterns are habit-forming.

But when we hear a word or name which we just learned the previous day, it often feels like more than a mere coincidence. This is because Baader-Meinhof is amplified by the recency effect, a cognitive bias that inflates the importance of recent stimuli or observations. This increases the chances of being more aware of the subject when we encounter it again in the near future.

How the phenomenon came to be known as “Baader-Meinhof” is uncertain. It seems likely that some individual learned of the existence of the historic German urban guerrilla group which went by that name, and then heard the name again soon afterwards. This plucky wordsmith may then have named the phenomenon after the very subject which triggered it. But it is certainly a mouthful; a shorter name might have more hope of penetrating the lexicon.

However it came to be known by such a name, it is clear that Baader-Meinhof is yet another charming fantasy whose magic is diluted by stick-in-the-mud science and its sinister cohort: facts. But if you’ve never heard of the phenomenon before, be sure to watch for it in the next few days… brain stimulation is nice.

Written by Alan Bellows From DamnInteresting.com

Louise Hay - You Can Heal Your Life: The Movie

This entertaining and inspirational movie based on the best-selling book of the same name is hosted by author and teacher Louise L. Hay. This film gives penetrating insights into Louise’s fascinating personal story; and shows how her views on self-esteem, abundance, and the metaphysical causes behind physical ailments were developed. It also reveals how she applied these concepts to her own emotional, spiritual, and professional life.

A number of luminaries in the fields of self-help, philosophy, health, spirituality, and New Thought join Louise, giving their take on success, happiness, and the myriad ways in which people can heal their own lives. And there are also gripping firsthand accounts from others who have been positively affected by Louise’s work.

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Some Thoughts On The Mind…

Throughout history, in every great teaching, culture and religion, a central principle is the power of our thoughts to build the life we desire. The essential power of our thoughts is no secret…except to those who have yet to learn it.

“Man’s mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions.”
– Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.

“For as a man thinketh in his heart so is he.”
– Proverbs 23:7

“All that we are is the result of what we have thought; it is founded on our thoughts; it is made up of our thoughts. A man’s life is the direct result of his thoughts… We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts we make the world.”
– Gautama Siddhartha (Buddha)

“To know, yet to think that one does not know, is best; not to know, yet to think that one knows, will lead to difficulty.”
– Lao-Tzu

” A thought is an idea in transit.”
– Pythagoras

“He who learns but does not think, is lost! He who thinks but does not learn is in great danger… Men of superior mind busy themselves first getting at the root of things; when they succeed, the right course is open to them.”
– Confucius

“Let go the things in which you are in doubt for the things in which there is no doubt.”
– Mohammed

“Mind is the creator of everything.
You should therefore guide it to create only good.
If you cling to a certain thought with dynamic will power,
It finally assumes a tangible outward form.
When you are able to employ your will for constructive purposes,
You become the controller of your destiny.”
– Paramahansa Yogananda

“They can because they think they can.”
– Virgil

“Our life is what our thoughts make it.”
– Marcus Aurelius Antonius

“It is not the events but our viewpoint toward events that is the determining factor. We ought to be more concerned about removing wrong thoughts from the mind than removing tumors and abscesses from the body.”
– Epictetus

“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”
– Shakespeare

“I think, therefore I am.”
– Descartes

“The universe begins to look more like a great thought than like a great machine.”
– Sir James Jeans

“Mind is the Master-power that molds and makes, and man is Mind, and ever more he takes the tool of Thought, and shaping what he wills, brings forth a thousand joys, or a thousand ills. He thinks in secret and it comes to pass; Environment is but his looking-glass.”
– James Allen

“What the mind of man can conceive and believe, the mind of man can achieve.”
– Napoleon Hill

“If I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.”
– Mahatma Gandhi

“Somehow I can’t believe that there are any heights that can’t be scaled by a man who knows the secrets of making dreams come true. This special secret — curiosity, confidence, courage, and constancy, and the greatest of all is confidence. When you believe in a thing, believe in it all the way, implicitly and unquestionable.”
– Walt Disney

“Happiness is not a matter of events; it depends upon the tides of the mind.”
– Alice Meynell

“Human beings can alter their lives by altering their attitudes of mind.”
– William James

“Our life is what our thoughts make it. A man will find that as he alters his thoughts toward things and other people, things and other people will alter towards him.”
– James Allen

“When you rule your mind you rule your world. When you choose your thoughts you choose results.”
– Imelda Shanklin

“Think positively and masterfully, with confidence and faith, and life become more secure, more fraught with action, richer in experience and achievement.”
– Edward Rickenbacker

“You have to expect things of yourself before you can do them.”
– Michael Jordan

“We are what we think; as we desire so do we become! By our thoughts, desires, and habits, we either ascend to the full divine dignity of our nature, or we descend to suffer and learn.”
– J. Todd Ferrier

“The significant problems we face today cannot be solved on the same level of thinking we were at when we created them.”
– Albert Einstein

“The soul attracts that which it secretly harbors; that which it loves, and also that which it fears; it reaches the height of its cherished aspirations; it falls to the level of its unchastened desires. Every thought-seed sown or allowed to fall into the mind, and to take root there, produces its own, blossoming sooner or later into act, and bearing its own furtive of opportunity and circumstance. Good thoughts bear good fruit; bad thought, bad fruit.”
– James Allen

“What gets us into trouble is not what we don’t know. It’s what we know for sure that just ain’t so.”
– Yogi Berra

“The world we see that seems so insane is the result of a belief system that is not working. To perceive the world differently, we must be willing to change our belief system, let the past slip away, expand our sense of now, and dissolve the fear in our minds.”
– Gerald G. Jampolsky

“Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living and your belief will help create the fact.”
– William James

“To think health when surrounded by the appearances of disease or to think riches when in the midst of the appearances of poverty requires power, but whoever acquires this power becomes a mastermind. That person can conquer fate and can have what he or she wants.”
– Wallace D.Wattles

“What the mind does not attend to, the mind dismisses. What the mind attends to, the mind considers. What the mind constantly considers, the mind believes. What the mind believes, the mind eventually does.”
– William J. McCrane

“Man, alone has the power to transform his thoughts into physical reality; man, alone can dream and make his dreams come true.”
– Napoleon Hill

“Just as each plant has its foundation in the hidden soil of the earth, so too are your thoughts based in the inner part of yourself… By learning what goes into creating within the inner part of your mind and what the process of growth is for your thoughts, you can learn how to make your thoughts stronger and healthier, and enrich your existence.”
– Brad Jensen

“Your thoughts are the architects of your destiny.”
– David O. McKay

“Reality is not so much what happens to us; rather, it is how we think about those events that create the reality we experience. In a very real sense, this means that we each create the reality in which we live.”
– Dr. Albert Ellis

“Thought takes man out of servitude, into freedom.”
– Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

“We lift ourselves by our thought, we climb upon our vision of ourselves. If you want to enlarge your life, you must first enlarge your thought of it and of yourself. Hold the ideal of yourself as you long to be, always, everywhere — your ideal of what you long to attain — the ideal of health, efficiency, success.”
– Orison Swett Marden

“We tend to get what we expect.”
– Norman Vincent Peale

“All things are created twice. There’s a mental or first creation, and a physical or second creation of all things. You have to make sure that the blueprint, the first creation, is really what you want, that you’ve thought everything through. Then you put it into bricks and mortar. Each day you go to the construction shed and pull out the blueprint to get marching orders for the day. You begin with the end in mind.”
– Stephen Covey

“You are today where your thoughts have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts take you.”
– James Allen

“The mind is not a vessel to be filled but a fire to be kindled.”
– Plutarch

“The more intensely we feel about an idea or a goal, the more assuredly the idea, buried deep in our subconscious, will direct us along the path to its fulfillment.”
– Earl Nightingale

“Our imagination is the only limitation to what we can have in the future.”
– Charles Kettering

“Our subconscious minds have no sense of humor, play no jokes and cannot tell the difference between reality and an imagined thought or image. What we continually think about eventually will manifest in our lives. The first order of business of anyone who wants to enjoy success in all areas of his/her life is to take charge of the internal dialogue they have and only think, say and behave in a manner consistent with the results they truly desire.”
– Sidney Madwed

“A man’s felicity consists not in the outward and visible blessing of fortune, but in the inward and unseen perfections and riches of the mind.”
– Anacharsis

“For success, attitude is equally as important as ability.”
– Harry F. Banks

“Any fact facing us is not as important as our attitude toward it, for that determines our success or failure. The way you think about a fact may defeat you before you ever do anything about it. You are overcome by the fact because you think you are.”
– Norman Vincent Peale

“Every achiever I have ever met says, “My life turned around when I began to believe in me.”
– Robert Schuller

“Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds. The latter cannot understand it when a man does not thoughtlessly submit to hereditary prejudices but honestly and courageously uses his intelligence
– Albert Einstein

“It is not who you think you are…or even who you think you are not that really determines success…it’s who you think you are becoming…”
– Doug Firebaugh

“A belief is not merely an idea the mind possesses; it is an idea that possesses the mind.”
– Robert Bolton

“Once you begin to believe there is help ‘out there,’ you will know it to be true.”
– Saint Bartholomew

“What this power is, I cannot say. All I know is that it exists…and it becomes available only when you are in that state of mind in which you know exactly what you want…and are fully determined not to quit until you get it.”
– Alexander Graham Bell

“People become really quite remarkable when they start thinking that they can do things. When they believe in themselves they have the first secret of success.”
– Norman Vincent Peale

“You can conquer almost any fear if you will only make up your mind to do so. For remember, fear doesn’t exist anywhere except in the mind.”
– Dale Carnegie

“Poverty is a way of living and thinking, and not just a lack of money or things. Prosperity is not just having things. It is the consciousness that attracts the things. Prosperity is a way of living and thinking, and not just having money or things.”
– Eric Butterworth

“The person who sends out positive thoughts activates the world around him positively and draws back to himself positive results.”
– Norman Vincent Peale

“The Law of Attraction attracts to you everything you need, according to the nature of your thought life. Your environment and financial condition are the perfect reflection of your habitual thinking. Thought rules the world.”
– Joseph Murphy

“People are just about as happy as they make up their minds to be.”
– Abraham Lincoln

“The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts: therefore, guard accordingly, and take care that you entertain no notions unsuitable to virtue and reasonable nature.”
– Marcus Aurelius

“Mind is the master weaver, both of the inner garment of character and the outer garment of circumstance.”
– James Allen

“Truly, thoughts are things, and powerful things at that, when they are mixed with definiteness of purpose, persistence and a burning desire for their translation into riches, or other material objects.”
– Napoleon Hill

“Be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind.”
– Romans 12:2

The Lost Art Of Dream Incubation

Dreams can provide us with a direct link to the unconscious, allowing a much larger perspective than our physical senses. They provide an ideal means for honing intuition, for bringing about profound feelings and states of being, for self-exploration, and ultimately, for discovering our own true nature. We can even follow in the footsteps of Tibetan monks who master dream skills as a stepping stone on the path to enlightenment, as the following experience suggests:

“Falling asleep, I remember wondering what truly ‘knowing myself’ would be like. Dreaming, I become aware of this incredible, indescribably powerful ‘Love Light.’ The thought comes that there is no power in the universe like it — it’s absolutely non-judgmental, and dwarfs every worry or desire I’ve ever had. It is peace and simplicity and well-being. It includes sexuality but encompasses far more. Basking in what feels like ‘an ocean of grace’, I begin to realize that I’m not looking at it, but rather that I AM it, recognizing myself.” (C.W., Palo Alto, CA)

1. Choose Your Goal

You can incubate a dream on any topic you choose, but you will have the greatest success with those goals in which you have some emotional investment. Pick a problem or question that concerns you, one which you would be willing to explore. Or, choose an interesting or intriguing goal, one that excites you and with which you can have some fun.

2. Immerse Yourself in the Goal

Engage in activities relevant to the goal. Read books or notes on your chosen subject. Utilize photos, movies, or objects to form associations. Rehearse the situation in the waking state, using role-playing or discussion. Pray or meditate to the goal; fantasize about it. Visualize writing the dream in your journal.

3. Feather Your Nest

Create an atmosphere that will most encourage the dream. Provide a peaceful place to sleep. Choose a time when you are not fatigued, in which you have not indulged in stimulants or heavy food. Have your notebook, pen and light available for recording the dream, or use a tape recorder. Do not give yourself a short length of tape or piece of scrap paper to record–this defeats your confidence in the dreaming process. Retire at a reasonable time if night sleeping, or awake yourself in the early morning hours to return to lighter sleep. You might also try day sleeping.

4. Narrow Your Focus

Write down your request. Outline all aspects of the topic on paper. Get in touch with how you feel about the situation, especially all those reasons for not wanting to resolve or experience the goal. Give yourself permission to discover and explore. The point is to be specific about your goal, but open-ended about the results. Finally, write down the phrase that most clearly speaks to your deepest desires. Use the first person–after all, this is your dream! Date the dream and write “Dream I” if you wish, to indicate to your dreaming mind that you are ready to record.

5. Open Your Expectations

Relax and put yourself in the mood or emotion of your goal. Concentrate on the energy and feeling of the topic. Repeat your goal phrase to yourself. You may, depending upon the topic, choose to adopt one of the following approaches: mantra, affirmation, prayer, or command. If your mind wanders, gently bring it back to the topic. Avoid thinking of alternatives. Think about the topic firmly, but don’t force it. Then let yourself drift into sleep.

6. Sleep and Dream

Trust your dream maker to respond to your request.

7. Recall Your Dream

Try to awake before your usual time to rise: use a music alarm, a partner, or give yourself the suggestion prior to sleep. You might try drinking several glasses of water before sleeping. Don’t move; remain prone and try to recall the images of the dream. Hold on to the feeling tones: these can sometimes conjure up the related dream visuals. When you have the first fragment, turn over in bed to another position–this may stimulate additional dream portions. Try still other positions until you have the fullest recall. Reexperience the dream several times, noting a key word from each segment to help reconstruct the whole dream.

8. Record Your Dream

Record all dreams as soon as possible upon waking. Include the feelings associated with the dream. Title and date the dream, and use the present tense. If, while recording, you have any immediate associations with waking life, note them. If you have no dream recall, simply record the feelings upon waking, or the first thoughts that pop into mind.

9. Reinforce Your Dream

Record each dream! The seemingly trivial can often contain a profound message. Treat all “failures” kindly; encourage yourself to try again. Sometimes the incubated dream will appear on a succeeding night. Share your dream with a partner or group. By yourself, you can try various methods of interpretation. But do something with the dream; actualize it!

First published as Magallón, Linda Lane. “Dream Trek: Incubation Techniques: How To Dream To The Target,” Dream Network Bulletin, 5/3 (1986), 15.

Going With The Flow (Video)

Let go of your resistance and understand how good it can feel by letting go. The following video by Esther Hicks is a wonderful discussion on how going with the flow can improve many areas of your life. Fear, depression or loss of control is just another way of hanging on and not letting go. When your stream is moving fast and your not flowing with it, your life becomes increasingly miserable. Not going with the flow is at the heart of every negative emotion you’ve ever had. Stop paddling upstream against the current.

Does Your Brain Have A Mind Of Its Own?

How many times has this happened to you? You leave work, decide that you need to get groceries on the way home, take a cellphone call and forget all about your plan. Next thing you know, you’ve driven home and forgotten all about the groceries.

Or this. You decide, perhaps circa Jan. 1, that it’s time to lose weight; you need to eat less, eat better and exercise more. But by the first of May, your New Year’s resolutions are a distant memory.

Human beings are, to put it gently, in a unique position in the animal world. We’re the only species smart enough to plan systematically for the future — yet we remain dumb enough to ditch even our most carefully made plans in favor of short-term gratification. (”Did I say I was on a diet? Mmm, but three-layer chocolate mousse is my favorite. Maybe I’ll start my diet tomorrow.”)

In a wonderful study conducted at Stanford University in the late 1960s, psychologist Walter Mischel offered preschoolers a choice: a marshmallow now, or two marshmallows if they could wait until he returned. And then, cruelly, he left them alone with nothing more than themselves, the single marshmallow, a hidden camera and no indication of when he would return.

A few of the kids ate the oh-so-tempting marshmallow the minute he left the room. But most kids wanted the bigger bonus and endeavored to wait. So they tried. Hard. But with nothing else to do in the room, the torture was visible. The kids did just about anything they could to distract themselves from the tempting marshmallow that stood before them. They talked to themselves, bounced up and down, covered their eyes, sat on their hands — strategies that more than a few adults might on occasion profitably adopt. Even so, for about half the kids, the 15 to 20 minutes until Mischel returned was just too long to wait.

Toddlers, of course, aren’t the only humans who melt in the face of temptation. Teenagers often drive at speeds that would be unsafe even on an autobahn, and people of all ages have been known to engage in unprotected sex with strangers, even when they are perfectly aware of the risks. (To say nothing of the daily uncontrollable choices of alcoholics, drug addicts and compulsive gamblers.)

What gives? Why are we as a species so often so desperately poor at achieving our goals? If we are, as the selfish-gene theory would have it, organisms that exist only to serve the interests of our genes, why do we waste so much of our time doing things that are not, in any obvious way, remotely in the interest of our genes? How can one explain, for example, why a busy undergraduate would spend four weeks playing “Halo 3″ rather than studying for his exams?

The selfish-gene theory doesn’t, in itself, answer these questions, but there is another facet of evolution that can: The fact that evolution is entirely blind, unable to look forward, backward or to the side. As Charles Darwin observed, evolution invariably proceeds through a process called “descent with modification.” In lay language, this means that Mother Nature never starts from scratch, no matter how useful an overhaul might be. Everything that evolves necessarily builds on that which came before. Our arms, to take one simple example, are adaptations of the front legs of our primate ancestors.

In practical terms, that means that evolution’s products aren’t always particularly sound. Truly dismal solutions are quickly weeded out; if someone has a genetic condition that brings them into the world without a functioning heart, they don’t live long enough to reproduce. But merely adequate solutions (what engineers call “kluges”) — like the awkward, injury-prone human spine, good enough but far from perfect — can stick around indefinitely if better solutions are too far away on the evolutionary landscape.

In the mental machinery that governs our everyday decisions, kluges abound. Take, for example, the scenario described in the beginning of the essay — the fellow who forgets his errand on the way home. His problem is clearly not in finding his way to the grocery store — it’s in remembering to go in the first place.

The problem is that evolution failed to realize that remembering goals is not like recognizing objects. When your brain sees a lion, the thing to do is to decide, lickety-split, to get out of the way. Run first; ask questions later. We’re programmed for just that kind of split-second decision; just about every creature on the planet is built such that it can identify things like predators and prey very rapidly. We’re not programmed to remember precise episodes from the past. Why not? Because remembering the exact date on which you last saw a lion is not particularly helpful when you’re trying to get out of the way.

Alas, evolution didn’t have the foresight to realize that different kinds of tasks require different kinds of memory, and it used the same basic sort of memory for everything, not just for remembering what lions and tigers look like (in which general tendencies suffice) but also for cases — like tracking our goals — where a bit more precision would have been helpful. As a result, trying to remember what to do next can be a little like trying to remember what you had for breakfast yesterday: There are too many breakfasts and too many yesterdays for our biological memories to keep track of.

The same thing can happen with our goals. When you sit in your car late in the day and ask yourself, “What am I supposed to do next?” and all of a sudden the cellphone rings, your brain can easily lose track of which “next step” is the right one. Instead of zeroing in on the specific memory it needs, it may well settle for remembering whatever you’ve done in the car most often — and that’s drive home. Voila, autopilot.

Our attempts to pursue our goals are often thwarted by the fact that evolution has built our most sophisticated technologies on top of older technologies — without working out how to integrate the two. We can plan in advance, using our modern deliberative reasoning systems, but our ancestral reflexive mechanisms, which evolved first, still basically control the steering wheel. When the chips are down, it’s those mechanisms that our brains turn to, and that means that our brains frequently wind up relying on machinery that is all about acting first and asking questions later, squandering some of the efforts of our deliberative system.

No sensible engineer would have designed things this way. Why design fancy machinery for making long-term goals if you’re not going to use it? Yet the brain is structured such that the more tired, stressed or distracted we are, the less likely we are to use our forebrains and the more likely to lean back on the time-tested but shortsighted machinery we’ve inherited from our ancestors.

Still, all is not lost. Even though our short-term desires are pretty good at grabbing the steering wheel of our consciousness, our more recently evolved deliberate minds are powerful enough to regain at least some measure of control.

Consider, for example, the difficulty that most people having in sticking to abstract goals like “I intend to lose weight” or “I plan to finish this article before the deadline.” Nice thoughts, but not formulated in terms that your ancestral, reflexive brain might understand. The work-around? Translate those abstract goals into a form your ancestral systems — which traffic largely in dumb reflexes — can understand: if-then. If you find yourself in a particular situation, then take a specific action: “If I see French fries, then I will avoid them.” As Peter Gollwitzer, my colleague in New York University’s department of psychology, has shown, even simple changes like these can markedly increase the chances of success.

Our conscious, deliberate systems will never have total control, and our memories will never be perfect, but as they say in Alcoholics Anonymous, recognition is the first step. If we come to recognize our limitations, and how they evolved, we just might be able to outwit our inner kluge.

Gary Marcus, a professor of psychology at New York University, is the author, most recently, of “Kluge: The Haphazard Construction of the Human Mind.”

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